We both know what this is….

Your heart to my hand

you came in right when i started to stand

I’ve been on the cold, hard ground for so long

Yet, here you are

Despite the fact that you’re so far

in the night, I noticed you were the brightest star

and you know you are

i try to hide

but again, there you are

The light in you won’t let me go too far

How can this be?

Is this true thing called you know what, really happening to me?

Wanted to find reasons for you to let me be

but im chain free and i still didn’t start running

i had a plan to do this thing called life with just me

and then unexpectedly and so suddenly you appeared to me

I knew you were special from the beginning

Painful scars i shared with you

You kissed them all and shared yours too

Everyone thinks i’ve lost my mind

Because how does shit like this happen in such a short amount of time?

But when you know, you know

And you, I instantly knew were mine

I still have plans of my own

And i don’t know what the future will hold

But if you wanna make God laugh, tell him your plans, so I’ve been told

You’re everything I’ve always wished for in a man

Didn’t know that it would be after I met you, that life would have truly began

You know everything and you still chose to stay

And for once, I did not want to push a man away

You are my best friend, my mind reader, my eating buddy, my protector, my twin flame, my soul mate

I know without a shadow of doubt that I wouldn’t have it any other way

You asked me, if i could go back in my past, would I change anything?

originally i said I’d change everything

But after getting to know you more and more everyday, my answer to your question has drastically changed

Because you see, i realized, that if everything had been perfect and flawless, I wouldn’t have appreciated you like i do

It’s like you’ve been drowning for so long in water, and then somehow youre finally able to get your head above the water and you take that first breath of fresh air

There is nothing like that feeling

You are my first breath of fresh air

Had i never experienced drowning, i wouldn’t have ever even known what a breath of fresh air felt like

And i would have never been able to recognize that you gave me life that i didn’t have before

So i just want to say thank you and just know there will be more things in our future for me to thank you for

But this little piece of you that i got to have for myself has got me wanting more and more

and i know you are the one for me, and that i am 100% sure

Thank you for being who you are, and for not letting anything, not even the distance keep you from breaking down my sealed, hidden, locked door

You don’t get scared away easily and i put you through so many tests

I’m so glad you passed them all with flying colors

Some people die without ever even feeling a drop of what you and I have together

We make eachother better and i want to keep what we have going even when were gray and old

All of this i say to you and only you, My Vance Peter Toledo.




narcissist, you are

and you know this

you know it’s true

wondering where all my problems started

probably began with you

pitting others against me

it’s sad, the lengths you go to

just to make my life small

smaller than you

Your foot over my head

I’ll never be good enough

You’re so slick

Everything I know about you

has no proof

But karma don’t give a damn about you

The shit you’ve done to me

Will eventually come back to you

In one form or another

One for you

and one for your mother

funny, you really aren’t that clever…

Destined to be a memory

we were just 2 ships passing by

in the sparkling night

you jumped ship to mine

I didnt think you’d survive

But you came out alive

Still, I wasn’t ready for your dive

So i tried my best to hide

You hung on for dear life

But you weren’t the problem, for it was I

I saw the sincerity in your eyes

and it made mine start to cry

But I wouldn’t let you come inside

So I was the one who had to say goodbye

You looked for a sign in the sky

And it took you a while to realize

That we were nothing but 2 ships passing by

In the sparkling night…

Vicious Cycle

Lady A is chasing herself

Striving to feel secure

Man A is pursuing her

And being pursued by Lady B, who he would never prefer

Her admirer, Man B is going after her in a moment’s spur

The best man at his wedding, Man C has a secret love so deep for him that it’s all a blur

And how does this all occur?

It’s the circle of desire

Striving for what we think is higher

Sometimes love is just meant to inspire

Although when it isn’t reciprocated we just try harder

Which only adds fuel to the fire

And we burn ourselves up into a situation of complete dire

A spark from the flame within becomes a wishing star in the sky for whom we’d never entertain

And the cycle continues with only ourselves to blame

Dear Jesus,

Thank you Lord for helping me

For lifting me up in my times of need

All along you were my missing piece

I appreciate you Jesus for setting me free

The day i got baptised i remember hearing angels sing

I didn’t know it then but i know now you were celebrating

You saved my soul even though i was so undeserving

and i still am unworthy and it was only by your grace that I’m still breathing

I feel and see things that remind me that you are always with me

I pray you continue to protect my family

I pray that you continue to protect everyone living

I pray you continue to protect me

I know that you are real, I have faith in you and I believe

I know i turned my back on you in my past but I’m so glad you never stopped chasing me

I will forever be indebted to you Lord for everything you’ve done and for every single one of my heart beats

I love you

sincerely, your child 💕💕

Confessions of A Dark Road

There she goes, walking towards her dream. It’s in clear sight, yet still so blurry. The moon light hits her face. What a sight to see. She’s blind to her truth, doesn’t want to face reality. So she wanders at night like a rodent in the street, moving in darkness, letting the lights from the cars lead. She wonders if the world in her mind exists or is it only imaginary? As she fades into the shadows of her own mind’s misery.